Dancing with the Stars, 8 p.m., ABC
I could not be more pleased with this line-up: Kirsty and Maks (they will go out first, but it’s OK), Hines and Kym and Mark and Chelsea. Anyone but me notice how consistently well the Disney kids do on this show? Hmmmm. I want Hines and Kym to win because I don’t like Mark Ballas and all his “dance” faces that he makes and how awesome and hot he thinks he is. Plus, Kym also died and all.
The Bachelorette, 9 p.m., ABC
Her name is Ashley. I’m sure she was wronged in a previous reality show, perhaps even on The Bachelor. She is lovely, and yet, like all women looking for love on television, wracked with self-doubt: “Twenty-five eligible men arrive; Ashley admits to worrying the men will be disappointed with her.” Sigh. One step forward, 50 steps back. Thanks Ashley.
Taboo, 10 p.m., NatGeo
Tonight, prison love. I have no idea what that means, and there is no way I am Googling it, as I think the bosses would not be pleased if I crashed the company’s system with an overload of porn.
I could not be more pleased with this line-up: Kirsty and Maks (they will go out first, but it’s OK), Hines and Kym and Mark and Chelsea. Anyone but me notice how consistently well the Disney kids do on this show? Hmmmm. I want Hines and Kym to win because I don’t like Mark Ballas and all his “dance” faces that he makes and how awesome and hot he thinks he is. Plus, Kym also died and all.
The Bachelorette, 9 p.m., ABC
Her name is Ashley. I’m sure she was wronged in a previous reality show, perhaps even on The Bachelor. She is lovely, and yet, like all women looking for love on television, wracked with self-doubt: “Twenty-five eligible men arrive; Ashley admits to worrying the men will be disappointed with her.” Sigh. One step forward, 50 steps back. Thanks Ashley.
Tonight, prison love. I have no idea what that means, and there is no way I am Googling it, as I think the bosses would not be pleased if I crashed the company’s system with an overload of porn.